Admitting you’re wrong and apologizing is hard enough in your personal life, but having to do it at work can be absolutely dreadful. Navigating an apology when you’ve made a mistake in the office is often tricky because many fear there might be professional consequences from taking the blame. But accepting responsibility has actually been seen by many throughout history as the sign of a good leader.

If you are truly at fault, it’s always better to own up to your mistakes at work rather than pretend you’re blameless. That said, your work-related apology should look a little different from a personal one, and there are instances in which you should be wary of apologizing at all.

When to Apologize:

1. When it’s obvious you made a mistake.

If everyone already knows the mistake was your fault, there’s no reason to pretend otherwise. Doing so will only make you appear immature and it may lead to colleagues or higher-ups not trusting you to tell the truth in the future.

2. When you are at least partially responsible, but you know admitting fault will help solve the issue faster. 

These instances are sometimes hard to recognize, so here’s an example — Let’s say, you were working on a project with another colleague and the boss asked both of you to send over your notes. Unfortunately, you didn’t establish ahead of time who was going to send the report, so the boss never received an email, and now they're upset. Technically, it’s not entirely your fault, but arguing over who messed up is only going to slow down the project and sew discord.

Instead, perhaps consider attaching a quick apology to the report before sending it to your boss, that way you and your colleague can move on from the mistake quickly and without further issue.

3. When not apologizing/admitting guilt could be detrimental. 

You may encounter a situation in which nobody at work knows you’ve made a mistake, but if left unaddressed, your slip up could cause major problems down the line.

In these instances, you should do what’s best for the project at large and address the issue head-on. Not only is this the right thing to do by your coworkers, but there’s also a chance that someone will find out you were responsible after everything has fallen apart. In that case, you could end up being blamed for ruining the entire project instead of just messing up one little thing.

How to Apologize:

If you’ve found yourself in one of these situations, but are unsure how to issue your apology, here are some guidelines you should follow:

• Don’t try to couch your apology in excuses or explanations. Just tell everyone what happened and say you’re sorry.

• Focus on how you personally plan on fixing the problem, and don’t throw anyone else under the bus if you can help it.

• Allow colleagues and managers to ask questions instead of getting defensive. Mistakes are learning opportunities, not just for you, but for everyone else on the team as well.

When Not to Apologize:

As important as it is to take responsibility when you make a mistake at work, you don’t always have to give a formal apology, and in fact, sometimes doing so could end up hurting you in the long-run. If you feel the urge to say you’re sorry, but you’re not sure why, ask yourself the following questions first:

1. Am I apologizing just because I don’t like tension or because it seems easier this way? 

Over apologizing is a real thing, and oftentimes people who suffer from anxiety will find themselves apologizing when they haven’t actually done anything wrong. Women also tend to apologize more often than men, for a number of reasons. The problem with apologizing too much is it can end up subverting your own confidence, and lead to colleagues/managers seeing you as someone who does make more mistakes.

2. If I don’t feel responsible, is there a way for me to acknowledge the problem without having to apologize? 

Sometimes, a problem is really nobody’s fault, and just because you’re the one who has to address it, doesn’t mean you should shoulder unnecessary blame. There are ways to shed light on an issue without accepting responsibility.

Consider using phrases like this:

“It’s unclear what, if anything, could’ve been done to avoid this, so let’s just focus on fixing the issue and moving on.”

“Regardless of who is or is not responsible, we can all learn from the issue at hand and take steps to not repeat this problem in the future.”